#13. No Luke? No Clare.

It's hard to believe that a week ago today we thought today would be the day that Clare and Luke would be born. They have now been with us for 3 days already.  Today, however, was not as exciting as we hoped it would be. After chasing down the Reclining Buddha and checking out some other sites in the morning, we headed to the hospital hoping to bring the babies home.  We met with the doctor who told us the previous day that it would depend on their numbers, both the weight loss/gain and the jaundice-related statistic (which she presented as anything under 10% is 'good and go home' and anything 10-12% is 'stay one more night').  Clare has lost a tiny bit more weight, but nothing to worry about.  Her jaundice measurement was 7%, so great.  Luke's weight was also fine, but his jaundice measurement was at 10.2%, and, unfortunately, that 0.2% does make a difference.  We were advised to keep him in the hospital overnight so he can be under the lamps and improve.  We were given the option of bringing Clare home today, but we couldn't leave Luke alone tonight. So, we left his sister in the nursery to keep him company.

This was disappointing news for Chris and me.  After traveling now for 2 weeks, we are really craving getting into some sort of routine (as crazy as that will look/be!).  We know staying at the hospital a 4th night is what needs to be done.  I think it will make their discharge from the hospital even more exciting tomorrow.  As eager as we are, we have to remember how fortunate we are they made it to 36 weeks.  Though we avoided having the kids need to stay in the NICU, they are still premature and need a little extra TLC.  Our time will come to be able to finally have these babies all to ourselves.

With the unfortunate news, we took our subdued spirits to the nursery to see the babies.  We 'bathed' Clare...meaning the nurse actually did most of the job...we failed!  We have some things to work on with the bath part for sure.  We sat and held both Luke and Clare for about an hour and tried feeding them. Clare was awake most of the time but was stubborn to feed.  We never saw Luke's big blue eyes today. The boy needed his sleep and had no interest in his bottle.  We are hoping this was our last hourly visit with the kids. As much as we've enjoyed the hospital and the nursing staff, it's time to bring these babies home.  

No pics today, but I did update post #12 Fathers Last Freedom with our morning adventure if you want some visual stimulation.  Hoping to have a more upbeat post with lots of pics tomorrow.

#12. Fathers Last Freedom

The last 24 hours have flown by and we continue to get closer to bringing Clare and Luke home from the hospital.  In the meantime, outside of our hospital visits, we have been trying to get out and enjoy Bangkok and our (soon to evaporate) free time.

Sunday Night

Last night we had dinner with another surrogacy couple who both live in Bangkok.  I 'met' one of the guys on a Thai Surrogacy forum several months ago.  We corresponded often throughout our pregnancies, sharing ultrasound updates.  He actually gave me a lot of comfort the past few months by sharing first hand information about the IVF Clinic and his surrogate's check ups.  He was kind of my surrogate for our surrogate!  It was great to meet up with these two guys and share our journeys to having children.  Their surrogate was scheduled to give birth on July 31, but SURPRISE!!  She went into labor this morning and they are now parents a little sooner. Congratulations, guys!!  Clare and Luke have some new friends in the nursery tonight.

On our way home, Chris and I had a drink at a place called the 'Moon Bar' on the 63rd floor of a hotel. This is one of the things I wanted to do that I previously hadn't in Bangkok (if you saw Hangover II, you saw a Bangkok 'sky bar'). The bar was neat with an amazing view of the city and all of its high rises.  The menus were lit up

This feature probably cost us 100 baht alone

and the views were spectacular.

Chris beaming at the Moon Bar

Monday

After our hospital visit today we had a couple of hours to kill before a meeting at the IVF Clinic.  So, we took to the Sky Train.

Yep, we're in Thailand

View from Sky Train stop...how many 7/11's can you spot?

We decided to fill that time with a trip to MBK...an enormous shopping mall with 6 or 7 floors.

MBK

I call it 'mall on crack'.  Think of a normal mall with 3 times as many shops per story fit into the same amount of space.  MBK has everything...clothes, electronics, souvenir stalls, jewelry shops, just about any type of store you can think of.  We had lunch at the famous 6th floor food court where you have to pre-pay and then buy things from the various food areas.

Plenty of options

We didn't end up doing much actual shopping (outside of buying 6 dvd videos...we are going to be staying in a lot over the next few weeks!), but we found my favorite store in the mall (I stumbled upon this shop 10 years ago when I visited...it's actually a pharmacy).

We couldn't find a July 19 store, but we found the store for my birthday!

We have been picking things up along the way for the nursery back in Chicago.  By things, I mean elephants...they are everywhere here in Thailand.  The kids will have quite a stash by the time we come home.  This will represent their 'wicker' version (we are getting a little crazy about the elephant thing) of the elephant.

What if they don't like elephants?

Luckily, we made it home in a taxi before rush hour started.  This is one thing we are learning...no taxis between 4 and 8 PM.

Nobody's going anywhere...as seen from our balcony

After being flanked by about a dozen or so people inviting us to naughty, naughty places (I won't even begin to share the names of these places and what we have heard happens at these places), we had dinner at a Japanese steak place,

I want meat and I want it now

Ok, here you go!

which might end up being a meal we title, 'The Last Supper'.

Hence, the 'tall' Singha

We headed home to work (Chris)/blog (me)

Chris, practicing his walk over the bridge with baby in tow

maybe for our last night of a full night's sleep for awhile!

Tuesday

Today we decided to head out early to take in a few more sights before heading to the hospital to 'determine our fate'.  We started by taking the river taxi up to Wat Pho, the temple that has an enormous reclining Buddha.

Welcome mat

After entering the temple complex,

Chris at Wat Pho entrance

we saw a photo showing we weren't the first American celebrities to visit this place.

Buddha likes us better

The grounds of Wat Pho are pretty amazing.  There are chedi's (or stuppa's) of all sizes everywhere.

Stupefying Stuppas

There are also crazy amounts of Buddhas.  There are non-stop rows of Buddhas,

Biggest Buddha collection in Thailand

fantastic Buddha scenes in sanctuaries for people to worship,

Take your shoes off and stay awhile

and Buddhas handing out high fives.

Giving a good 'ole Matt Ross (no touch) high five

But, everyone comes to Wat Pho for the Reclining Buddha.  At 150 feet long and 50 feet tall, it's pretty impressive.

Big headed Buddha

From head to toe

The feet of this Buddha are mother of pearl inlay with various images.  Really cool.

There are 108 of these on the Reclining Buddha's feet

After leaving the temple, we took our first tuk-tuk in Thailand (we have been using cabs...a cab has a meter where as you have to bargain with a tuk-tuk driver...we are growing tired of bargaining).  It was a fun little ride but felt a little bit like we were on a 'Sizzler'.

We walked through an older area of Bangkok called Banglamphu, and down the famed Thanon Kao San road.

Thanon Kao San

It was a little too touristy (meaning we were being hawked by tuk-tuk drivers every 10 feet, asked if we wanted custom suits made, and had every tour guide ready to take us to places we had just been) for us. We didn't stay long, but long enough to buy some tank tops. Bangkok is so unbelievably sweltering hot (and humid) at times that we finally broke down and bought some sleeveless shirts.  It didn't take long for Chris to change into one of his during today's touring.

He found this one with elephants...its a beer shirt

We made our way to the Golden Mount, a hill with a temple at the top that has panoramic views of Bangkok.

Lookin' up at the golden mount

The views were good, but the best part was probably the breeze at the top!  We did realize

we are beginning to figure out the layout of Bangkok.

We live in this direction...somewhere

After climbing back down, we headed back to our home area to have lunch

Open-air dining near home

and then check in on the babies. Would they finally be ours to take home?? 

#11. Look Who's Awake Now?

This morning, we headed over to the hospital around 11:00 for Visit #3...'The Bathing'.  We stopped in to pick up some flowers for our surrogate as we wanted to check in on her today.  When we arrived, Clare was already cleaned up, but the nurse showed us some pointers on how to give Luke a bath (can we bring her back to Chicago to help us out?).  Suddenly, he reverted to his first minute of life mode, turned red, and was none too happy.

He settled down after he was swaddled and never shed a tear thereafter.  Once the bath was done we headed into a 'feeding room'.  After the nurse helped us get started and comfortable,

The nurses at BNH are great...this one is our favorite

we were left to be alone in the room for almost an entire hour.  I fed Luke and Chris fed Clare.  Yesterday, Clare was our 'zombie child' and had trouble staying awake for the bottle.  Today, that title went to Master Luke (Chris likes to think it is his golden touch since he is 2 for 2 on feeding the kids so far)!  He flashed his big blue eyes for a few minutes, but soon fell asleep with bottle in mouth.

Going...

                            

Going...

Gone!!

                                                       

Even when he's asleep, he's still fun to hold.

Me and 'Buddy'...his first of many nicknames

T

oday was Clare's day to show off.  She slugged down her bottle,

Clare going to town

but ultimately paid the price with the hiccups.  

                                      

Clare kept her eyes open for the rest of our visit.  It was nice to interact with her and see her looking around with her own pair of blue eyes.

Thanks for letting us see those pretty eyes today!

We tried for the day's sibling shot.  This time it was Luke who couldn't stay awake.  One of these times we will get them with both eyes open.

They switched things up on us!

We are loving these kids more and more each minute we have with them.

Proud Papa

Seeing Double

After leaving the babies, we met up with the hospital pediatrician.  She brought us into her office and it immediately felt like parent-teacher conferences (I've only been on the other side!).  We were very anxious to hear about Clare and Luke's progress and were thrilled to find out they are doing very well.  The doctor shared a thorough report with various recorded statistics.  Their weight drops have been normal and their blood sugars are fine.  She said that tomorrow (Tuesday) she will test the blood sugars again in the morning and if they are at a certain level, the twins can come home with us!  Wow, now it's really getting real.  If the numbers aren't quite where they should be, they will come home Wednesday.  The doctor was great with her explanations, and we had no further questions (well, Chris became curious about where we have to pay!).

Before we left the hospital, we took some flowers to our surrogate's room.  One of the nurses tagged along to help with the communication.  Our surrogate was sleeping and we felt bad for waking her up, but she allowed us to enter the room.  Her mother was with her in the room as well.  While we didn't know what to expect in visiting, it was important for us to convey our genuine thanks for what she has done.  We will never know completely the circumstances for why she chose to become a surrogate, but we will always think of her and be thankful for carrying Clare and Luke.  We are happy to report that she is doing great with no complications whatsoever.  We will see her again in a couple of weeks when we go through the process of 'gaining custody' for Clare and Luke and all of the necessary steps to come back home.

Tomorrow could be a very big day!

#10. 4652 Grams of Awesomeness!

Our first family selfie!

Luke and Clare are now over 30 hours old and all is going well.  The last 24 hours have been quite hectic for us. We switched rooms at our long term stay hotel only to be put in a room that wasn't going to work (to put it mildly).  Unfortunately, we didn't realize this until we unpacked completely.  Things have since worked out, but we have been in 3 different rooms in 3 days at the same hotel!  We are now happily, and finally, unpacked and ready to 'live' in the same place for awhile.  Phew.

Visit #1

Everyone is most likely here to see photos and updates on the twins.  I promise not to disappoint.  We have had two visits with the newborns.  Visit #1 is what I call 'The Viewing'.  After their births yesterday (and the change to our 2nd of 3 different rooms in 3 days) we went back to the hospital to see Clare and Luke.  For this visit we were allowed about 30 minutes or so to see the babies in their carts through the glass wall,

Clare and Luke behind a glass wall

although, at first it was only Clare,

Our peaceful little girl

because it was Luke's time for a bath.

He wasn't too happy about this

We eventually had both babies in view and enjoyed time looking at them, comparing their features (they are very unique), and gazing at the miracles behind the glass.

Luke all cleaned up

As much as we wanted to break through the glass and hold them, we enjoyed all the time we had with them during this visit.

Chris with Clare

Me and Luke

I took a snapshot of their 'info' and eventually translated their official numbers.

Miss Clare Pamela Knapp-Heald
Born on 19 July 2557 at 7:19
Weight 2280 gms (5.0 lbs)
Length 47.5 cms (18.7 in)

Master Luke Stephan Knapp-Heald
Born on 19 July 2557 at 7:20
Weight 2372 gms (5.2 lbs)
Length 46 cm (18.1 in)

We looked up the 2557 part and, indeed, it is 2557 based on the Buddhist calendar which is 543 years different than ours.  Once they translated these info sheets to English today, the dates are what we typically recognize but we thought it would be interesting for Luke and Clare to see the Thai version some day.

While Visit #1 was taking place, we had the chance to meet two other couples (both Australian) who had babies this week (both boy/girl twin sets like us) and who have been working with Kim, the same surrogacy coordinator as us.  One couple had babies on Wednesday and one had just finished up Visit #2 with their babies that were born the day before ours.  It was interesting to meet other folks going through the same process and emotions as us.  We are so happy for the other couples and their success.  Maybe we will have to set up a twins mixer before we all head home!?!

One might wonder what two dads do the night their babies are born.  Even though we had nothing to do with the actual birthing process physically, we were remarkably exhausted by the day. Still, we managed to treat ourselves to dinner out (pizza), then went for massages (me the feet, Chris the shoulders...Chris says he feels like he was beat up!), and then out for drinks at a bar down the street, where we enjoyed looking back through the day's photos and talking about our new family.

Trading excited texts with Lisa-Marie

Visit #2

Today, we woke up, repacked (to head to our 3rd and FINAL room in 3 days), and then headed over to the hospital for Visit #2...'The Feeding'.  For the second visit (we are learning this as we go...as different as this may seem, the nurses and staff at the hospital are kind, helpful, professional, and amazing), we were allowed into the nursery area and time to hold, bond with, and feed our babies.  Having Clare handed over to me was like being given the biggest trophy in the world (Wimbledon??) and I had to hold myself back from holding her up in triumph!

The first hold!

Both babies were very relaxed today and, mostly, sleepy.  I already get the feeling Clare will be the one that keeps our family calm.  She is so laid back and seems unphased by the change in her environment in the past day.

Clare, calm as can be

Chris took Luke for his first hold.  

Papa Chris and Luke

Yesterday was a rough day for Luke but he showed good progress today and was much more relaxed.  Luke seems likely to be the explorer in our family.  As our visit lengthened, he began to open his eyes to observe who and what was around him. 

Luke lookin' around

Today, Chris and I did start to think the babies were showing some recognizable features.  Clare has long eyelashes (like daddy) and her grandma's chin.  Luke likes to stick his tongue out while he looks around and is quite gassy (both family traits)!  We can't wait to see more of their physical and personality characteristics begin to appear.

In all, we had about a full hour of time with the babies.  One of the nurses came over to help us feed the babies.  She showed us some moves (we will take all the help we can get!) to tuck away for the future. Clare wanted to sleep more than eat, but slowly downed most of her bottle.  Luke sucked his down in a couple of minutes...what a champ!  I think that's why he got the hiccups and then the gas.  

At least they are getting along now!

We can't wait for tomorrow and Visit #3...'The Bathing'.  We will head back to the hospital tomorrow at 11:00.  We also hope to pop in and see our surrogate for a few minutes.  We hope she is recovering well from her surgery.  While it may be difficult to communicate with her (due to the language barrier), Chris and I can't thank her enough for being a part of helping make our family dream come true.  I'll sign off from this post with a couple of photos of two very happy dads.

Eeny, meeny, miny, moe...

Hangin' at the hospital with the Class of 2575